Thursday, December 20, 2007

Random. Totally Random.

Just some random thoughts this past week. - Always knew Clemens was a user. - The writers' strike officially stinks. I should be able to go home after work this fine Thursday evening and watch a new episode of The Office. The love of money truly is the root of all evil. - We took our annual trek to Southern Lights last night. We went with my mom and my sister's family, as is the case most years. Someone had the bright idea that it would be nice to have a girls' vehicle and a boys' vehicle. That meant that Haley and Austin were in one car oohing and aahing over the lights, and I got to be in the car with Cameron (who was in act-as-silly-as-possible mode), Alex (who was in laugh-at-everything-Cameron-says mode) and Brandon (who was in talk-as-much-as-possible mode). Actually, it was quite fun. They tried to act like they were too old, but eventually the chatter turned to the lights. And Brandon even joined me for a rousing rendition of the 12 Days of Christmas. (Yes, I know Austin is a boy, but he wanted to be in whatever car Amber was in.) - Haley went to for her neuropsyche eval yesterday. Apparently she handled it very well. While we won't know the results of most of the testing for a week or so, we do know two things: 1) Academically, Haley is solidly average, which is a good thing. 2) She is very, very good at comparing and contrasting. - Speaking of Haley, she's exceptionally competitive. In everything. She wants to race down the stairs. She wants to race to see who finishes their food first. She wants to win every game. She wants to be prettier, bigger, smarter, faster, funnier than everyone else. What's funny is that she's often saying "Alyssa (the neighbor girl) thinks everything is competition." Another funny: when I was on my way home one day, she told Kelsee that the first one down the stairs to greet me at the door won a kiss with me. Nice. - Big K sodas aren't bad. They make the best red cream soda, in my opinion. There orange pop, mixed with vanilla ice cream, makes a mean orangecicle float. And I've just discovered they have a decent knock-off of Mountain Dew Code Red. - Our insurance and health care system sucks. For like the 86th year in a row, my insurance plan had a double digit increase in premiums and a decrease in coverage. And it still takes months to get in with some specialists. The issue is on the platform every election. Just once I'd like the president and congress to do something to make it better. - December 22. BYU in the Las Vegas Bowl. Go Cougars! (BTW, the BCS sucks. So do conference/bowl affiliations. Nine of the 12 teams playing on New Year's Day have worse records than the Y and five of them are ranked lower. Plus, all six games have a larger payout than the LV Bowl. Sheesh.) That's all. Until next week...

Monday, December 17, 2007

What's the Point?

Cold weather with no snow is pointless. It's like junk food with no flavor. It's like the emperor's new clothes, an All Star game with no winner, or a ballyhoo'd report on steroid use with no proof. It serves no real purpose. I mean, what do we look forward to in winter? Is it the breath-taking freezing wind gusts, or is it the beautifully falling snow, the outdoor activities with your kids, the adventure of driving among folks who act like they've never seen the white stuff, let alone drive on it? Plus doesn't it seem more like Christmast when it snows? No one sings "I'm dreaming of a brown Christmas!" And "Walking in a Winter Wonderland" most certainly didn't refer to walking across muddy brownspaces. I wasn't prepared for the snow last year. We didn't have lots, but when it did come, Haley and I attempted to sled down our little hill on 1) a large cookie sheet and 2) a garbage bag. Didn't work well. However, Haley and I made snow angels and had a snow fight (not a snowball fight; it was too powdery and didn't stick together well). We also built a snow mountain (no, not a snowman; see the previous parentheses). Anyway, I think Santa might be bringing Haley a sled this year, so we better get some measurable snow. We had plenty of white-free winters in Seattle. Let me leave you with a classic but excellent video. It's the Evolution of Dance at its finest.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Finding a Career

Haley wants to be a cheerleader. She wants it so bad that she mentions it all the time. It's the first item on the list of things that wants to be when she grows up. (By the way, also on the list are soccer player, basketball player, doctor, mom and, added just last Saturday, hip hop dancer.) Haley doesn't just want to be a cheerleader in school. She wants to do it for a living. The last couple of weeks, Haley's insisted on playing cheerleader when I get home from work. This play consists of me laying on my back and steadying Haley with my arms as she stands on my stomach with her arms in the air. She chants: "M-S-U!" and I answer back: "Go-Big-Blue!". We do this a few times, then cheer wildly. This desire of hers does not come as a total surprise (does the phrase "born to boogie" mean anything to you?), but it does leave me feeling a little depressed. If you are a cheerleader, a former cheerleader, or a family member of a cheerleader, please feel free to skip the rest of this post. I have a problem with my daughter becoming a cheerleader. It's my problem. I recognize it is primarily ignorance or some other less than noble issue. I can't get the stereotype out of my head: ditzy and annoying. Sure there are other stereotypes, some worse, some better, but these are the ones I've personally experienced. I've watched cheerleaders chant "De-Fense!" when their team had the ball. I've been annoyed repeatedly by the shreiky cheers, including the worst: "Guuuuu!" instead of "Gooooo!" I've watched subpar pepsters distract from the game by building precarious human towers as the audience looked on in utter horror. (Bear in mind, I'm a fan of Morehead State sports, and their cheer squads have won like 50 national titles. Much of the above paragraph doesn't apply to them, which you would think would help placate my feelings.) Like I said, this is my own problem. I'm sure others stereotype me as a jolly fellow who likes food and sits on his butt all day. And they would be right. Which is exactly my point! Anyway, I guess I'll end this. I've got to hit the web to find some new routines Haley and I can try.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Haley - 5 going on 28

Haley has suddenly developed a strong "mothering" attitude. A couple of instances: Situation 1 A few weeks ago she became obsessed with my evening personal hygeine routine. One night she after she brushed her teeth, washed her hands and put on her hand sanitizer (strawberry melon, given to her as a gift), she marched into the dining room where Kelsee and I were clearing the table. She positioned herself in front of me and the following conversation ensued: Haley: "Dad, before you go to bed you need to brush your teeth, wash your hands and use my sanitizer. OK?" Me: "Um, OK." Haley: "Promise?" Me: "Sure, honey. I promise." Of course I didn't do it. The next evening after she'd finished the same routine, she confronted me again. Haley: "Dad, did you brush your teeth, wash your hands and use my sanitizer last night?" Me: "No, dear." Haley: "But you promised!" Me: "I know. I forgot." Haley: "Promise that you'll do it tonight." Me: "OK." Now, what about Kelsee in all of this, you may ask. Nothing. Haley demands no nighttime hygeine ritual for Kelsee. I attribute this to one of two things: 1. I'm putting Haley to bed each night and she must think I stink. (This is apparently something females are born with, this concept that men are pigs.) 2. Kelsee put her up to this. ------- Situation 2 See the traffic school story on my Nov 30 post. ------- Situation 3 The other night, Kelsee and I had a fire in the fireplace. We had one of those four-hour firelogs in there, which apparently can burn for longer than four hours. Needless to say, we needed to go to bed, so we just decided to let the log burn out. We made sure everything flammable was away from the fireplace, and went to bed. Haley woke up and came to our room a few hours later and noticed the log was still burning. She commenced to confront Kelsee about it later, informing us that we should never leave our fire unattended because it could catch the house on fire. ------- Situation 4 Haley, the Peacemaker. Whenever Kelsee and I get in an animated discussion, which isn't all that often, Haley always attempts to intervene. (By the way, I don't yell, I animate. Kelsee yells.) Haley will tell us we don't need to fight, and if that doesn't work, she feigns a headache. No just so you know, to Haley any animated discussion is a fight, even if we aren't fighting. Kids. Anyway, couple these items with bribery (see Kelsee's post), drama, flirting, moodiness, and love of purses, jewelry and clothes, and we've got our hands full with a 20-something woman trapped in a five-year-old girl's body. Time to invest in some intimidating device to keep the boys at bay, or to keep her in line.