This Post has No Fitting Title

Just read an interesting article: http://www.wsmv.com/news/15357541/detail.html Must really suck. --------- In other news, we tore off the wall and ceiling paneling in our basement. The good news is none of the studs are damaged from a leak in the corner of our basement. Also, the inside has a water barrier. The bad news is the inside has a water barrier, which means we are probably going to have to dig out our back yard and put some drainage in. We also have a leak under our kitchen sink that has come through the basement ceiling. However, I think this will be an easy fix. You know, since I'm a plumber. On that same note, on our visit to Indiana, my mom stated that my dad had absolutely no skill whatsoever when it came to home maintenance and improvement. Therefore, I do not take the blame anymore. It was inherited. ---------- We enjoyed the total lunar eclipse last night, thanks to God smiling down on us. As I listened to an NPR story about it on the way home from work, I lamented the cloudy sky. When I stepped out of basketball just after 10 last night and saw a clear sky, I was giddy. (Yes, men can be giddy, just not in groups.) Anyway, Haley happened to be awake when I got home, and she and Kelsee had been viewing it from the family room window. We got out my binoculars and braved the frigid night to view it a little closer. We could get a nice view of Saturn (though my binocs didn't show the rings) and the star Regulus. It was very nice. Several times last night, Haley just out of the blue started listing off all the planets, unpromted. She got Mercury ("Mercmury"), Earth, Neptune ("It's really cold"), Mars ("It's red") and Venus. With a little help she got Pluto ("Sounds like Playdough, huh?") and Saturn. She didn't remember Uranus or Jupiter. She also shared with us that she wouldn't want to stand on Neptune without her socks on shows because it is too cold. Keep in mind, during preschool two years ago they had a lesson on the planets, and I read a little book to her about the planets once a long time ago. That's it. Just another example of her amazing memory. She'll say "Do you remember...?" and share some obscure memory. We've ceased to question whether it really occured or not.

Here in my car, I feel safest of all...

Funny Car Accident Old Lady - Click here for more home videos --------- So, I determined it was high time I posted about cars and driving. You know, since 1) a few years ago I came to the realization I was very opinionated, and 2) I really hate other drivers. A great combination indeed. I speed. Sure I do. Most people do. I've received four tickets in my day for speeding. And I've been pulled over at least twice more and warned. On the freeway, I rarely drive less than five miles more than the speed limit. I feel comfortable driving less than 10 miles more. When I'm running late, I will at times go just less than 20 miles more than the speed limit. This also happens when I'm listening to some good music and not really paying attention to my speedometer (a scary thought, indeed). I occasionally tailgate, but that's because I'm provoked. That's it. That's the extent of my potential moving violations. (Don't listen to my wife when she says I don't stop at stop signs. A clear attempt to smear my driving record.) I don't cut people off (usually) or run red lights (on purpose). I don't pass in a no passing zone or fail to use my turn signal. I stop before turning right on a red light (most of the time) and never turn right at a red light if the sign says I can't. I only make U-Turns if there is no sign forbidding it. I try to be curteous when I drive, waving at those who let me out in front of them, ceding the right of way to mergers, and slowing down when someone attempts to pass me. I pull to the left lane when passing a police officer on the right shoulder and slow down to the speed limit in work zones. I think those who don't do the things in the above paragraph are either awful drivers or jerks. Or both. Never has this become more apparent than at the intersection of Rosemont Garden and Nicholasville. Nicholasville Road is a tricky road because of the reversible lanes. Yet there are some things that are very clearly marked. For instance, their are two lanes on Rosemont where it intersects Nicholasville. One always turns left onto N-ville. The other turns left and right or just right, depending on the time of day. This is because in the afternoon/evening rush hour traffic, N-ville has only one lane heading into Lexington. There is one left/right turn lane and four lanes heading out of Lexington. (This is the opposite of the morning rush hour.) There is a sign a couple of hundred feet back from the intersection stating the hours. I can understand missing that. However, clearly visible even several hundred feet before that is a large sign hanging next to the traffic lights at the intersection. The sign is digital. It shows that you can only turn left and right in the mornings and only right in the afternoons. It has a nice bright arrow curving to the right and nothing curving to the left. It's big. And bright. And clearly visible. And bright. Anyway, every afternoon (not to be confused with occasionally) some idiot jerk decides to turn left from that right lane, which means that basically two lanes are trying to dump into one lane. This is problematic on many levels, not the least of which is that every lane on N-ville is full of cars. And the jerks on N-ville are already sitting in the intersection gridlocking (like they didn't know of the high likelihood of the light changing while they sat there.) You can always tell a person knows they are being a jerk because they refuse to make eye contact. If they thought they were innocent or at least clueless they'd be looking at you wondering why you were trying to cut them off. I refuse to yield the right of way to those morons, and have almost forced them into the curb on the side of N-ville. And yet they still don't look at me! Aggrevating. Other driving annoyances: - The guy at the light who refuses to inch forward so cars can get in the right turn lane even though he has half a car length of empty concrete in front of him and the guy behind him is revving his engine and very clearly can fit through with just another inch. - The person who passes in the no passing zone. - Tailgaters in the left lane who are tailgating a person who is already exceeding the speed limit by more than 10 miles an hour. - Drivers who don't get in the turn lane to turn left. (Why else would it be there???) - Drivers who weave in and out of lanes of traffic. I'm stopping because I'm getting frustrated. -------- On a more positive note, here's a good tip I read in e-mail. If you have a remote control with panic button for your car, keep it beside your bed. If your in bed at night and you here a prowler in your house, just press the panic button and pray it wakes the neighborhood. This doesn't apply to people who live in the country and miles from neighbors. You didn't want the neighbors to hear your late night parties or loud music or marital contentions, so you'll just have to live without this nice tip.

Let it snow...

What's wrong with snow? It rocks! Kirk (the guy I carpool with) is from southeastern Texas. He hates the snow. It's cold and wet and stupid. Tim (my boss) is a motorcycle enthusiast. He hates the snow. It's cold and wet and stupid. I, on the other hand, love snow. I love watching it fall. I love seeing the way it shimmers in the sunlight. I love driving in it, playing in it and feeling the cold flakes melt on my face. My only frustration is we haven't gotten very much snow in years. Seattle is practically snow free. And the winters we have been back in Kentucky have been pretty mild. Aren't we due up for another winter "Storm of the Century"? How can I order one of these? Can I do it on the web? Needless to say, for the second year in a row we are heading for a weekend trip to visit my grandmother. In Indiana. Northern Indiana. It's supposed to be in the mid-20s or something this weekend. However, it's not supposed to snow until Monday, but I'm holding out hope that it happens faster and we get snow to drive in on Sunday. Plus, I'm hopping there is still measurable snow on the ground. I'm bringing Haley's sled. We will play in the snow, dangit!

A New Haley-ism

So Haley has discovered the joy of my Palm Pilot. She wants to play games or draw on it whenever she gets a chance. Usually, she just goes to my work bag and gets it out. However, the other day I had taken it out of the bag to use as an alarm clock. Afterwards I placed it on the bookshelf. A few hours later she comes into the dining room where Kelsee and I were playing a game and asks, "Daddy, where is your stylusphone?" Needless to say I think I pulled something laughing so hard. ----- By the way, here are some pictures of Haley and some of her cousins at Kally's wedding.

The Many Faces of Haley

Thoughts on a long weekend...

From Kally and Kris's wedding to an MSU game to the Super Bowl. So much to say... Friday night: - Wedding rehearsal. So Kally decided to have all her little neices and nephews participate in the wedding. Plan was to just have them walk down the aisle in matching dresses (for the girls) and matching pants and sweaters (for the boys). Simple enough. Question was, how to do it. The initial idea was to have Hannah (7), Haley (5), and Kennedy (4) hold the hands of the younger ones (Graydon and Brady (3), Zachery and Harper (2) and Alex (1+)). Problem. Hannah is holding hands of Graydon and Harper. Haley holding hands of Brady and Alex. All the younger ones decide to go in opposite directions. Poor Hannah and Haley, trying to corral the little kids. And poor Kennedy. Zach just cried because he wanted to hold Brady's hand. Sheesh. Anyway, there was a good, albeit humorous, solution (see below). - I substituted for one of the missing groomsmen during the first runthrough. I have a couple of thoughts about this. First off, I've never actually been a groomsman. I attribute this to either the fact that I'm antisocial and have no friends, or the fact that most of my friends are old and/or married (sorry Jeff and Kirk). Not that I'm sad or anything. Far from it. My job was to chaffeur my daughter, my wife and a tree. No worries, no stress and no excessive standing. My kind of wedding. Needless to say, I was replaced after the first runthrough. I wish I could say I was victim of downsizing, but alas, I fear I was fired for poor performance. - After the rehearsal, we went back to Kourtney's house to help find music downloads for the wedding. We found a great hip hop version of "Here Comes the Bride". And while everyone joked about using it, no one had the guts. Wimps. Saturday afternoon: - Family pictures an hour before the wedding? I don't think so. We did get them done just after the wedding. Not only did they want to get all the kids to smile and look forward at the same time, they expected them to sit, on their own, on the step in front of the adults. Ooookay. Of course, even if they had gotten all the kids looking forward, they probably would have gotten all the adults looking down at the kids while saying "Look forward! Smile!" I also noticed they stuck me just behind Kally's veil. What's up with that? - The wedding was beautiful. I can say that. It truly was. It was full of all the sweet things weddings should be full of. Not to mention a little humor. As I said above, they came up with a solution of sorts to the kid issue. Someone come up with the great idea to have the kids just hold on to a navy blue ribbon/rope thing. Very quick thinking, if you ask me. Anyway, so here come the kids down the aisle, all pretty smiles and pretty clothes. Suddenly, Graydon, who was second in line, lets out a "Choo! Choo!", complete with arm motions. A couple of more Choo! Choo!s later and the train arrived at its destination. Had us all in stitches. Pretty cute. And yes, I said cute, as I'm secure in my masculinity. - As I said, the wedding was beautiful. Kally was glowing and, besides the fact that she was first marrying Kirby's wife (Kristin) as opposed to her own intended (Kristian), everything went off without a hitch. It was a brief ceremony, which is always nice. - Mom Kappes's new wedding cake recipe was awesome. However, it's a closely guarded trade secret, so I can't list it here. - The groom's cake was a hit, as well, as it depicted a scene that contained, in Kally's words, "All the things that Kris loves." It was basically a construction site, complete with red pickup, bulldozer, forklift, gravel, block walls and a port-a-potty. Since it supposedly contained all the things that Kris loved, I can only assume Kally was in the port-a-potty. - Speaking of Kally, I was all good until she and Kris were making their exit. I looked over at Dad and his face was all contorted like, complete with tears. Thanks, Dad. Thank a lot. I thought later that Kally was only 12 when Kelsee and I got married, which means I'd seen her grow up. She is more like my little sister, not just my sister-in-law. She's grown up into a remarkable woman, an interesting mix of Kelsee, Kourtney and her own free spirit. I think she's heading in the right direction in her life. - As for Kris, I had two interesting experiences regarding him last week. First off, we were playing ball on Wednesday and he just seemed off his game. At one point he expressed his frustration after a missed shot. Being on the opposing team, I teased him a little, and then excused his game, commenting "Your mind is on other things. You know what's happening in a couple of days." Innocent me was of course referring to his wedding. However, without skipping a beat, he drops the "boom-chicka-boom-boom" generic porn music line. Hey, whatever's on your mind, pal. The other experience involved a discussion between me and Jesse, an employee of Kris's who had come to play ball. We were sitting out a game waiting for our next run and we introduced ourselves to each other. I asked who he came with and he said Kris. He then proceeded to tell me that he had worked for Kris for four years and felt Kris was like a brother to him. "I think the world of him." What greater testament can you have than that? Not that I needed confirmation, but it never hurts. Saturday evening: - We headed to the Morehead basketball game (not Kally and Kris, who took the "get a room" line seriously). Nice win over a clearly overmatched Kentucky Christian team. We got a good glimpse of our key rotation guys next season, assuming we can keep these guys. Let me just say, the last time I enjoyed a team like this was during the Fick-Kinnard-Boardly-William-Majick-Witherspoon days in the mid 90s. Can we just pretend the Macy era never occured? Done. - Morehead is third in the conference at 8-5 and 11-10 overall. We've won 7 of 8. We have two seniors and a plethora of sophomores and freshman who contribute. Look out next season, folks! Sunday morning: - Church. Ivan taught the Young Men, so that was good. Sunday afternoon: - Nice, long nap. Sunday evening: - Super Bowl party. As usual, good food (way too much of it). A couple of good commercials, but nothing spectacular. A phenomenal game, complete with a play for the ages (near sack becomes miraculous catch). - This game might be one of the best SBs I've ever seen. Huge underdog pulls off unbelieveable upset over undefeated team many are tagging with the label of "best ever". - Manning's made the leap. - Super Bowl XLI and Super Bowl XLII, or Manning Bowl I and Manning Bowl II? - I don't care what anyone might try to say, but the Patriot's season IS a disappointment. I rooted the Mariners on in 2001 when they won 116 games (tying a record), but lost in the ALCS. Sure the season was fun, but without a title, they might as well have lost 116. Same thing here. 18-1 just doesn't have much of a ring to it. More of a thud. - Did I mention that the food was good? Sheesh, this is long. I'll leave with this wonderful video...

Random Thoughts...

So earlier this week I created an exceptionally creative and humorous post about who I was writing this blog for. Unfortunately, I lost the post through some irritating and stupid action on the part of me and my web browser. I'd worked on it, crafting a work of art, and in the blink of an eye it was gone. Needless to say, I couldn't summon the creative aptitude to create another post. The only reason I'm here posting this at this point is that my brain has accumulated an assortment of random thoughts that I need to get up here.

• Seems as though schools get cancelled for a lot less crappy weather now than they did when I was in school, or even a few years ago. Someone spits on the road and it gets too cold, they call off school. My theory has always been financial--we're a lawsuit happy society. Bus drives in difficult conditions, bus wrecks, kid gets hurt, parents sue. My friend Kirk adds another wrinkle to the finacial theory--it gets too cold, district must heat the schools, which ain't cheap. Since schools can't afford to provide all the services and programs to students anyway, they call off school instead of paying to heat the schools. Sounds good.
• I'm feeling old. Twice this last week, Kelsee has assisted me in the this endeavor. 1) While watching a Morehead State basketball game last week, our little group was talking about the crowd favorite, a freshman named Ken Faried. Someone noted that he is still just 17, to which Kelsee replied, "Jason, he's half your age." 2) We were watching House Hunters International the other night, and the couple on the show, who were about 40 years old each, commented that they had done things conventionally for the first half of their lives and that they wanted to do things differently the second half. I mentioned that I thought that sounded like a good idea, to which Kelsee replied, "Well, your second half starts in five years." Add in Kelsee's observation of a couple of weeks ago that she thought I was entering a midlife crisis at only 34 and she's being very helpful to my efforts to age ungracefully. Thanks, honey. 'Preciate it.
• Haley story: So we had a family home evening lesson recently about keeping the Sabbath day holy. Anyway, so we're at home late Sunday afternoon, and I just figured I'd sit down to watch catch a little of the NFL playoffs. Haley, who was messing with barbies in the same room with me, whips her head up and gasps within seconds of me landing on the channel. "Daddy, this is not keeping the Sabbaf day holy!" *Sigh* Chastized again by my 5-year-old. (BTW, this is the same kid who nearly panics when we pick up the sister missionaries and we have our non-church playing on the radio when they come out of their apartment.)
• So, I'm trying to adjust to life with glasses. I still have good acuity (20/20 or whatever), but I've developed an astigmatism, which basically means my eyeball is an egg and not a sphere. Anway, the biggest irritation isn't getting smudges or water droplets on them. Nor is it knocking them off when I take my sweatshirt off. It's not the weird feeling of looking through pane of glass constantly, either. It's that I keep getting caught staring at people. I never used to wear sunglasses much, but when I did, I could follow people along with my eyes and stare a little longer at the interesting ones. Sunglasses are great, because you can hide behind them. Now my instinct is to stare when I have my regular glasses on and when people see me the glare at me or quickly walk away. I guess this is bringing out my creepy side. Someone's going to punch me someday.

Unusual Post

This post isn't funny. It makes no attempts to funny, and that is unusual. I'm just feeling a little subdued at the moment. This was an interesting weekend. I'm not going to go into details, but it was a definite weekend of reflection. I woke up this morning feeling exceptionally glad I'm a member of my family. I feel like I have the best wife and daughter anyone could ever have, and I'm not sure why Heavenly Father blessed me that way. What did I do to deserve it? In spite of all my failings, weaknesses, inadequacies and idiosyncracies...

Moving Day (and a bonus Haley story)

From a office with an window to a cube. Our company continues to grow, and our space can hardly contain us. So they took an old file room in the middle of our office suite and crammed six cubicles in there. Guess who gets the cubes? The IT and Development teams! Before, we were in offices on the perimeter of the suite, with great window views of the pond outside. Now the view consists of beige cubicle walls. But it's really not as bad as it seems, for me at least. 1. I shared my other office with one and a half other people. (Ever seen half of a person? Pretty gruesome.) We were separated with cubicle walls. 2. The position of my computer that made the most sense put my back to the window and the afternoon sun made it impossible to see my screen. I used to have my blinds open in the morning and closed in the afternoon. I got lazy and quit opening them in the morning. 3. My old office had a key pad you had to punch a code into to get in. While this was good for keeping the undesirables out, it was a pain in the butt. You had to punch in every time you wanted to get in. The sound was annoying on days when folks kept coming and going. The door was finicky and if you didn't close it just right the flashing silent alarm would go off and you'd have go up front and disarm it. But hey, at least my stuff was secure from all the hoodlums here. 4. In my new cubicle, my back is toward the entry, so people can sneak up on me and scare me, which should definitely add to the excitement of the day. 5. Since our office was locked to the unprivileged, I had to do garbage duty once a week. That also meant that our office never got vacuumed. You should have seen it. ------- On another note, a Haley story. Last night before we went to bed we were working with Haley on her letters as part of her "schooling." We have these big plastic letters. Kelsee would hold them up and ask Haley what letter it was and what sound it made. Occasionally, I would ask Haley for a word that starts with that letter. (This was probably in an attempt to not be left out.) Anyway, we got to V. When I asked her for a word that started with V, she shrugged her shoulders. I tried to give her a hint. "What did we drive to church today?" We drive a van, by the way. She thought for a minute, and finally said: "Vvvvvvv-ehicle." Only Haley.

Now That the Fun is Over

Well, the holiday season is over. I'm not sure what that means exactly, at least with regards to my life. Fewer parties, I presume. Less eating. Well, at least less frequent eating. I can say that this was one of the most satisfying holiday season, though. We can thank Haley for that. First of all, there is nothing better than a little kid who is really starting to "get it" when it comes to Christmas. If Haley's life was like the Truman Show, we'd have handfuls of great soundbites as she built up to Christmas. She played the season exactly the way a kids should, complete with a never ending list of toy requests, questions about whether Santa was real, excitement at buying a gift for Mama (and the subsequent "secret" of keeping it from her), singing at the top of her lungs when we went caroling. A couple of stories... - As I think I mentioned in an earlier post, she carried her American Girl catalog around for days. Of course, Santa ended up bringing one, and that was her favorite gift, supplanting the Talking-And-Singing-Gabriella-from-High-School-Musical Doll. At least until that was supplanted by the Groovy Girl doll and accessories she opened a few minutes later. A few minutes later she opened a nightgown that her Grandma Kappes and Mama made for her AG doll that matched her own nightgown she'd received the night before, and the AG doll re-assumed the top spot. That changed again later that night when she received a trio of slumber party barbie dolls. But wait! That's not all! Then came the Karoake machine from Grandma Dee. Haley can't read, so the Karoake part isn't all that great. It's the fact she can play her own CDs and sing in the working microphone. Aren't we lucky? Now her favorite gift is whichever one she happens to be playing with. What a diplomatic child. - Haley is apparently an anxious child. So we'd been talking a lot about how Santa works. That he comes to our house on Christmas Eve while we are asleep and brings presents blah blah blah. Anyway, after we opened and put on our new pajamas at Kelsee's parents house (about 30 minutes from our house) we were all sitting around and talking preparing soon to head home. Haley and all the other cousins went back with their Grandma to look on the web on one of those track Santa websites and see how close Santa was to our state. At that time, he happened to be in Florida. Haley emerged from the other room with an anxious look on her face and came up to me. Suddenly she burst into tears. "Daddy I'm scared. We need to go home now. Right now. We're going to miss Santa and he won't stop at our house unless I'm asleep." Broke my heart! I consoled her and told her he was much farther away from our house than we were. Still we couldn't get out of there fast enough for her. - I sang a song in church during the Christmas program. Since this was only my third or fourth solo, I practiced it. A lot. I'd sing it in the shower. I'd sing it emptying the dishwasher. I'd sing it driving to the store. I'd sing it playing games. It got to the point that whenever I'd start to practice it, Haley would let out a groan, followed by: "Not again, Daddy!!!" - We had a ward Christmas party, ward caroling, primary caroling, a trip to Southern Lights with my family, a Kappes family party (Kelsee's dad's siblings and their brood), a birthday party for Kelsee's dad, Christmas Eve caroling, Christmas morning present-opening, Christmas afternoon present-opening (with Kelsee's family), and a day after Christmas present-opening (with my family). Sometime toward the end of all this, Haley sighed and said "I'm all Christmased out." And that was before the New Year's Eve party and spending half of New Year's Day with Sammi and Hannah. I know what you mean, Haley. I know what you mean.